Thursday, January 24, 2008

In Memoriam: Heath Ledger (1979-2008)

[I'm sorry. I know this is infantile, but I just can't resist! - HAC]

Brokeback Mountain Theme Song

[Sung to the tune of O Bury Me Not on the Lone Prairie. With profound apologies to the unquiet shade of Tex Ritter]

"O bugger me not on the lone prairie
Where the strobes and cameras roll over me.
Though it's in the script, it's a shame to see,
O bugger me not on the lone prairie!

"It makes no difference, so I've been told,
If I sell my ass, once I've sold my soul
To the studio and the industry,
But bugger me not on the lone prairie!

"For the bucks they pay, I'll do anything,
In that flick with Stiles, I would even sing.
I got no conscience or decency,
But bugger me not on the lone prairie!

"Don't give a damn how gross and obscene,
So before we roll, pass the vaseline.
Yippee ki yi yay, doing sodomy!
But bugger me not on the lone prairie!

"Those Jews and queers in the Academy
Will all go batshit praising me.
I'll win an Oscar, you wait and see,
But bugger me not on the lone prairie!

"So what's the problem, you well might ask
With me performing this pervert's task?
As you will see in the director's cut,
A rattlesnake bit me on the butt!"


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Haw haw!

11:05 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That one is a HOOT, Harold!

4:37 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This one is an instant classic, Harold! I never saw Brokeback Mountain, but I still wish I had saved your Star Trek parody when the actor who played Dr. McCoy died. That one is even ten times funnier than this one. That's dead on accurate about Julia Stiles, too.

9:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Like me old guv'nor said, to pose as something is as bad as to be that thing.

To Heath Ledger, posing as a somdomite.

11:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great! Publish a book and I'll buy it.

4:15 PM  

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